Happy Thoughtless Gift Day!
February 14, 2006 § 3 Comments
Ah Valentine’s Day, the day to show your loved one just how many hours it took for you to realize that you didn’t get her anything, then got them something in mere minutes!
Luckily retailers know this and do their best to assist you! Behold, the VD hall of shame:
Instead of telling you, I’ll spell it out in (cheap) gold.
I love you like a giant… cluster of worthless fragments of gemstone. Yeah.
Because an ugly ass heart in one color just isn’t enough!
Dude, your heart will go on.
Boys, take it from me: save your money. Buy a nice $10 bottle of wine, order takeout, skip the overpriced flowers, and have a nice evening. Really, we don’t want it.